You get married and suddenly there is another person around ALL.THE.TIME. The one time you can really look forward to time alone is the commute to work (if your spouse isn't going to the same place.) The best part of working in college admissions? All the time spent in the car on my own. Listening to whatever music I wanted. Singing to said music at the top of my lungs. Making random pit stops just because you want to. Oh, those were the days.
Then, the kids come along and those glorious, all alone driving moments are virtually non-existent. You live for the random trip to the store alone or those 5 minutes it takes to get from dropping the kids off to your office. I'll admit, I force reading on my kids each afternoon just so I can have time to myself.
I can feel it, too, when I've gone too long without time to myself. I can literally feel my blood pressure rising, I get very short-tempered, and even more irrational and high maintenance than usual. I become a very hard person to be around. But, I am so thankful that the Lord has blessed me with a husband that understands this. He knows when it's time to take the kids to the store, to play at the park, or to go see Grandma because I've had all I can take. I know, however, this is an area that I need to turn over to God on a daily basis. I have started getting to this point almost daily, and that is not good! Every morning I need to turn my day over to God and submit my plans and pride to Him. Every afternoon as I feel the onset of anxiety mounting I remember that I haven't asked God to help me with this yet today. That I haven't laid this area of my life at His feet today.
Oh, Lord, help me to rise each morning ready and willing to turn my whole life over to You. Give me the strength to leave it there. Father, as I feel the anxiety and irritation mounting, remind me to stop, take my worries and stress to You, and keep breathing. Help me to remember that the only way to make it through this life is with You by my side. Oh, Lord, I believe! Help my unbelief!!!