Wow! What a week it's been. It's been one of those weeks where I feel like I have been running around like crazy, nothings gotten done, and the house is mess. Except, see, I can't seem to think what in the world had me feeling so busy this week. I look back on the week and can't think of anything that happened this week that doesn't normally happen in a week. What had me so crazy? What had me running around doing everything but whatever it was I felt like needed to be done? I still sit here without any answers!
But, with this feeling overwhelming me already on Monday, I sat down and read one of my favorite blogs. You can read it here: http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/09/when-longing-to-choose-joy/. As I wrote on Monday this blog was about a woman I had learned about this summer and it moved me to tears. I have spent the week using any spare moment I had trying to find out how Sara was doing and if she had passed away, yet. I found no news on that, but read some of the most moving blogs I had ever read. I was moved to tears by every one of them! (Here are a few that you can read: http://www.jenniclayville.com/choose-joy-sara-frankl/; http://www.themomcreative.com/2011/09/choose-joy-celebrating-sara.html; http://www.jesusneedsnewpr.net/oh-how-my-heart-aches-a-blog-post/; http://dirtygirlsministries.com/blog/?p=5155; http://www.allthingsheartandhome.com/2011/09/15/its-not-good-bye-its-until-then/; http://lysaterkeurst.com/2011/09/my-last-text-to-sara/) There are many more posts that you can read, but these were among my favorite. I have never met this woman and I've only read a handful of her blogs, but I feel as though we've been friends for years. I feel an aching in my heart for the world's loss of a woman who could be so joyful and so God-focused in the midst of what I (and most other humans) would consider a miserable existence. My heart aches that I never got to meet her, shake her hand, or soak up her joy. My heart aches that, in my overly blessed and unencumbered existence, I cannot find even a fraction of the joy this woman lived with everyday. After reading these posts, it put a whole new spin on my week. I looked at everything with different eyes. Don't get me wrong, the laundry still piled up, the dishes in the sink were dirty, and there were still school lessons that didn't get done and messes that were made. But, oh, how those went from being aggravations to joys-joys because I had children to clean up after and to teach, I had dishes on which to eat plenty of food in the refrigerator, I had a washer and dryer for my clothes, and I had a husband to lay next to each night. Oh, what a joy this blessed existence is that I have been gifted by my amazing Heavenly Father. Oh, Lord, let me not forget. Lord, don't let it take moments every few months to remind me to live with joy. Remind me that joy comes from You and You alone, not from what's happening to me or around me. Lord, when all is said and done, when people talk about me, let it be like it is with Sara, that all memories and words are filled with You!
Just a few of the joys in the McSmith house this week:
-birthday parties for miracle 3 year olds where the best and most important gift is a Bible
-beautiful reminders of God's hand changing times and seasons
-the reminder to be like the tax collector and not like the Pharisee (humble and admitting I am a sinner rather than trying to make myself look better when God knows the truth anyway!)
-smiling children on beautiful fall days
-a husband who cleans the kitchen
-soul cleansing tears
-laughter with my hubby
-deep, gut wrenching music