August 17, 2011

Musings while I wait for the Hubby to get home from band practice...

--We started homeschooling this week.  It has been better than I expected, but I must admit that I still feel completely inadequate for this task.  Without a doubt, I know that I DO NOT possess the gift of teaching, so I feel like most of what I am doing is reading from a script (which is something I know I AM good at) and hoping that she can't smell the fear behind it all!  So far, I think it's working!--Tonight God really opened my eyes to a truth in my life.  I am a quitter.  Well, not sure that quitter is the right word, but I definitely don't follow the rule "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."  My motto is more like "If at first you don't succeed, give it up and stick with what you know you are good at in the first place!"  I feel torn about this, I mean, I know that there are things that I need to try and step out and do because it's what God has called or commanded.  But, I also know that we aren't all good at everything and it's really not true that we can do whatever we put our minds to and work really hard at.  Pretty sure I'll never be a basketball star or a concert pianist, no matter how hard I try!  So, how do I work through this and do my best to ensure that my kiddos are learning the right lessons? I mean, there are some things that you will try and fail because they were things we were never supposed to do in the first place.  Of course, there are also things you try and fail because it was the only way for God to teach you a multitude of lessons.  How do we discern between the two?  How do we know when it's time to turn around and go in a new direction and when it's time to give it all up to God and trust Him as we continue on that difficult path?  Yeah, that's right, discernment isn't high on my gifts list, either!  But, I will continue to ask God to fill me with discernment for those moments (and many others) so that He receives all glory and many will turn to Him.
--I have truly enjoyed getting to sit with Sophie in the service for some of the worship and the sermon.  Don't get me wrong, she's a long way from fully understanding anything she sings or hears, but, I do know that she is listening and that God has promised His word will never return void.  I am clinging to that each day!  I love that she is now asking to hear songs that we sing in the service and that she'll sing them at the top of her lungs in the van and in the house.  It has also been really neat to get to share with her what those songs mean.  (And I am really thankful for a husband who is much better at explaining things than I am!)
--I love that Kevin still takes Sophie on Daddy/Daughter dates.  I love even more that she asks him to take her.  She loves her daddy and her daddy loves her.
--I love that, when Ethan found out that Daddy and Sissy were on a date, he asked me if we could go on a date.  It melted my heart!!!  We had a picnic lunch together, just the two of us.
--Lord, I have been soooo richly blessed, in so many ways!  Thank you for the many blessings, not just in this world, but the many spiritual blessings, as well.  Open my heart and eyes to see You at work around me and in those around me. 

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